We left early this morning for a walk in the woods. First thing out the door–there they were–five deer. I heard her say, “Sitka stay. Leave the deer, Sitka, no chase.” I did it. I stayed. I just watched them watch me, wary and unsure what I would do, but I just watched them move up and over the hill out of sight. This is one of the hardest things I have to do, resist the urge to chase, but I try.
It isn’t often we get a chance to be heard, I mean really heard. For this moment I get to share my point of view. I don't know how long this opportunity will last, but I will make the most of it. I wish so much I could just speak in your language and tell you how I really feel, what I really want and what I really need. Most of the time, the best I can do is communicate with my eyes, a twist of my head and this bark I have. I feel lucky, I don’t have to bark much. I am not a big fan of all that noise. However, when I hear sirens, I do have to howl, howl like a wolf. I am almost sure I have wolf in my blood, but I digress. It’s not often my humans don’t get me. We get better at communicating all the time. To be honest, I have some difficulty getting them. There are so many rules! I do my best to obey the rules, like, “leave the deer, no chase.” Come on! The urge to chase I cannot betray. I sometimes don’t understand it–so primal, a drive that comes from the deepest part of me. I have to give chase. I am not going to do any damage, hell, I could never really catch the deer, but the chase feels so, so good. However, I am not running anymore. A good chase in the woods is always fun, but I no longer have to be on the run. I am home.
I am not sure how one dog gets to be so lucky. I've always heard that it is cats that have nine lives. Well, this dog is one lucky cat. I have been given more than one life. Before I came home with my humans I lived on the Rez, I was actually called Lucky. Those days seem like a lifetime ago. Even though no one calls me Lucky anymore, I am that... darn lucky. But these days I answer to Sitka. I guess I am named after a city in Alaska. Never been to Alaska.
My journey started in wide open lands somewhere in South Dakota, a place called Sisseton. I could stand on a ridge looking west into a panorama of undulating hills with the wind whipping the prairie grasses like waves, but I’ll come back to that story. Now, I live with two humans, Catherine and Gerard, two really great humans who adopted me. That means you go to live for the rest of your time on this earth in a forever home. My home is now place called Duluth where instead of sea of grass I look out over water with an expanse larger than the sea or so it seems. I can see water forever.
My humans take me to explore all along that lake. Water so clean and clear and cold to drink. Right here, where we live, there are deer and bear even though there are houses all around us. Everywhere I turn there are those squirrels that I am not fond of. I swear, they live to mock me. If I get a chance, I will chase them, but they run straight up a tree or pole and wag their wicked little paws at me. But overall this is a good life, a very good life. Not long ago, Catherine started being home all the time. Both my humans spend lots of time with me. I am rarely alone. After I left the reservation, I stayed for a short time in a place called a foster home. There were a bunch of us dogs staying there. We lived in crates during the day until the humans would come back and let us play in the yard together. But for eight hours or more we stayed in those crates. No crates here. I have my own bed and often I prefer to stretch out on their couches and that is just okay with my humans. Catherine and Gerard live with two cats, Kole and Moscow. It wasn’t easy making two cats part of my pack. It's just not natural. I know my humans are worried that if I play too hard, I will hurt those fur balls. Moscow and I have a relationship.
Moscow lets me chase him. He will even let me put his head in my mouth. Once he is in this compromising position, he gets real timid. I don't know where that urge comes from. Maybe it's the wolf thing. I do my best to be careful with him. I wouldn't want to spoil a good time. He can be a real hoot to chase around with. Now that girl cat, Kole, she doesn’t even give me the time of day and does her best to snub me. When I first arrived, she put up quite the fuss. I don't know how she does it, but she would puff up her fur making herself look all ominous and crazed. She would make this loud hiss and if I would go near her, her nails would come out and my nose would bleed. All I wanted was to just check her out. Like I said, including cats in my pack, well, I am still adjusting two years later. I really do love my life, I have no real complaints, in fact, life is great and most of all safe. Where I come from, I would have to struggle and fight for every morsel of food and now, well, let’s say I could stand to lose a few pounds. I am working on the exercise part, because my humans need to lighten up too. I hear Catherine talk often about a search for a dog to be a walking buddy. I am not exactly sure how she found me. I am glad she did. Even though I was never contained on the Rez, it was a dog eat dog world. Literally. But that is for another day to tell. We do get out walking, but ever since the snow came we don’t walk as far. I like it bes when one or the other of my humans take me out with them snowshoeing. I have the run of a great, wide open area. Gerard now takes me out for a short walk at night before we all go to sleep. I expect when the snow melts away we will spend more time outside together. Warm weather days are my favorite. All of us live outside it seems. This place has four decks for napping. Even now, I am content with sitting out on the deck to watch what may come our way. I am learning the boundaries of where I am expected to be and what is out of bounds. From what I have figured out, there is someone in the neighborhood who objects if I wander down the alley by myself. It's the place I go to relieve myself. I don't see the problem. I come right back. I just don't know who would object. So for now, I just hang out until my humans go down there with me unless a deer meanders by, then...well, like I said, I am trying.
What I struggle the most with is the food. I love food! The thing is I love THEIR food. Everything, almost everything they eat smells like dog heaven. It is like the drive for those deer. I have a drive to want food. Almost as strong is the drive to please. Now, don’t get me wrong, I am civilized about it. I've learned not to beg. I can tell that does not make my humans happy. I no longer have to fight anyone for sustenance. So I can wait. I know how fortunate I am to be here. I would never take food off their table. I would never put my paws on a counter. Let me tell you, I have seen some bad behavior in my life. I am on my best behavior. I don’t chew on anything that isn’t mine. I am polite with visitors. I follow most commands. Give me a tender morsel and I will learn those human words. I am just so happy to have a pack to belong to, a place to be warm, a place to lay my head and food. I do my best to honor all this kindness by being good dog, a loving dog, and I am loyal as the day is long.
This dog believes....
that our background and circumstances may have influenced who we are, but, we are responsible for who we become.
